It seems we keep doing the same thing over and over again—even though it never works. According to Einstein, that’s the definition of insanity. It is especially common in religious life and during political seasons—like the election cycle we’re in now. We all do it, it seems.
We keep defaulting to simplistic, black-and-white, either-or thinking. We ignore the complexity found in any issue, reducing it to a simplistic either-or, right-or-wrong decision. Of course, we think our position is always the right position. Those of us who identify as Christians frequently use the Bible to validate our position as the “right” position and thereby the only acceptable position. “The Bible says!”
This kind of thinking and this way of approaching issues is seldom, if ever, helpful. It inevitably creates us-them divisions. It prevents the kind of dialogue that is necessary for mutual understanding and progress to be made. It is a barrier to learning and, thereby, to personal growth. It denies the value of diversity. It ignores the many ways we are alike while focusing on our differences. It is a barrier to cooperation and compromise. It denies the gifts and insights that others have to offer while stubbornly clinging to the way we already think. It fosters a rigidness that demands “my way” and ignores the common good. It, in short, keeps us stuck, trapped in meaningless standoffs.
Operating out of this kind of black-and-white, either-or thinking, we approach others with an adversarial spirit. We use arguments that support our position—often ignoring or discounting facts that challenge it. At the same time, we attack—often ridiculing—the other’s position. We even go so far as to attack and demean the other person. In this approach, there is no place for kindness. Respect is forgotten. The spirit of this approach is hard, at best, sometimes bordering on being mean.
Missing in this approach is any understanding of or recognition of the emotional component of beliefs. This emotional component underlies and drives our beliefs. It is what creates the inflexible, rigid posture that defends our beliefs against any perceived threat.
This emotional component is more than emotions—although fear is a common expression of it. The emotional component is tied to our sense of identity. Beliefs are a vital part of that sense of identity. They are a common way of establishing our sense of being “right” and thereby okay. They are a way of compensating for our innate sense of inadequacy and the haunting sense that we are not good enough. They are a way we seek to find a place to belong—i.e., those who think like us.
Anything that challenges our beliefs touches these deep-seated, emotional issues—fear of being inadequate and not measuring up, fear of not being good enough, fear of not being valued, fear of not being accepted and belonging. Anything that shows our beliefs to be wrong triggers these deep-seated fears. It threatens our sense of identity and our sense of being okay.
These same deep-seated fears reinforce our us-them thinking. How the other is different threatens our sense of being right and better than the other—i.e., our sense of identity.
Understanding and addressing this emotional component is the secret to moving beyond the polarization that divides us. It is the key to moving beyond black-and-white, either-or, right-and-wrong thinking.
How might embracing our identity as beloved children of God—an identity not tied to being “right” or being better than others—help us move beyond the emotionally-driven insanity of our black-and-white, either-or, right-and-wrong thinking? How might viewing others as beloved children of God help us move beyond the us-them polarization we use to compensate for our fear of being inadequate and not measuring up, our fear of not being good enough, our fear of not being valued, our fear of not being accepted and belonging?
It seems to me the teachings of Jesus speak to
this emotional component that underlies our beliefs. Embracing his teachings just
might free us from its enslaving power.
