A Dangerous Game

It’s a dangerous game—one with devastating consequences spiritually. It’s one I’ve played. It’s one we’ve all played. It lies at the heart of and fuels our polarized political climate. During this election season, it’s one I catch myself playing even though I don’t want to play it. It’s one—if I could—I’d never play again.

I call the game “I’m right, you’re wrong.”

You know how the game is played. Pick an issue, any issue—moral, political, religious. We all take sides on the issue—some on one side, others on the opposite side. We can all argue why our position is the “right” position. As our position is the “right” position, the other position is naturally the “wrong” position. We can point out why that position is the “wrong” position.  

The game includes a subtle shift. The focus shifts from the position to the person holding the position. Since we are “right,” the other person is “wrong.” Sadly, this game in its most destructive version views the other person as ignorant—even depraved—eventually, evil—for believing what they do. “I’m right, you’re wrong” fuels “us-them” divisions in which we attack the other.

The game is built upon black-and-white, either-or thinking that ignores the subtleties, nuances, and many-shades-of-gray that are a part of any issue. No issue is as simple as either-or, right or wrong. If truth be told, the game doesn’t require any thinking at all. All that is required is listening for catch phrases that trigger angry reactions.

The game rides on fear—unrecognized fear of differences, of diversity, of those who are not like us, of thinking that challenges what we believe is true. It seeks to use certainty—i.e., black-and-white, either-or thinking—to calm the nebulous anxiety that lives just beyond the surface of our awareness.

The “I’m right, you’re wrong” game is foundational to our sense of identity—well, to our egocentric, constructed self. Our egocentric, constructed self is the persona we created based upon what the world (family, church, society) said we needed to be and do if we wanted to be accepted and valued. It is the persona we use to gain acceptance and belonging, value and significance in our social groups.

Because this persona is something we manufactured, it is fragile. We have to constantly reinforce it—through achievements and accomplishments, through recognition, accolades, and applause, through gaining status and standing, through having affluence, an abundance of things, and the status symbols affluence makes possible (neighborhood, house, car, adult toys, clothes, jewelry, etc.). One of the primary ways—if not the primary way—we prop up our fragile sense of self is by playing this game. By playing “I’m right, you’re wrong”—comparing and competing, criticizing, judging, and condemning—we unconsciously build ourselves up in our own eyes while putting the other person in a one-down position in relation to us. We need the “I’m right, you’re wrong” game in order to feel okay about ourselves. 

Therein lies a key danger of the game. It becomes a hindrance to ever discovering our true self—the person God created us to be. We substitute a persona we manufactured for the person God designed us to be. As a result, we live our lives endlessly striving for more. We never escape the comparing-and-competing mentality. We always see ourselves through the lens of what other people have.

This game is particularly dangerous when it is played with religious overtones—religious beliefs, religious practices, church involvement, “the Bible says,” moral issues. Reinforcing the “I’m right” posture with the God-card produces a closemindedness in one’s thinking and a rigidness in one’s position. The religious “I’m right” position cultivates spiritual arrogance that exists outside of the person’s awareness. This arrogance is seen in the criticizing, judging, and condemning that the person directs at others. If these outcomes were not enough, they are compounded by spiritual blindness. The person is not even aware of the spirit and attitudes that reside in their heart and surface in their criticisms, judging, and condemnations.

The ultimate danger of playing this religious “I’m right, you’re wrong” game is the person never knows the heart of God or experiences the gifts of God’s grace and forgiveness. Stuck in merit-based, deserving-oriented thinking and living, they are blind to the nature and character of God. They never learn or experience the grace-based ways of God.

How do we move beyond playing this “I’m right, you’re wrong” game that is so common to our human condition? We cultivate humility—the acute awareness that all that I am, that all that I understand is a gift of God’s grace. We cultivate a teachable spirit—the willingness to think, to learn, to grow beyond what I already think and believe. We work at listening, attempting to hear and understand the other’s position and what led them to it. We seek to understand the emotional components that led them to their belief? We refuse to argue. We respectfully state our position without attacking theirs. We refuse to play the game even when the other person baits us, attempting to engage us in it.

It is indeed a dangerous game to play—dangerous to our spiritual wellbeing.

The Heart of the Matter: the God Revealed in Scripture

Those who identify as Christians fall, for the most part, into two categories, regardless of their denominational affiliation. Which category is determined by how they view and use the Bible.

One group views the Bible as the divinely inspired Word of God. Thus, it is treated as the final authority on all issues. These Christians use such terms as “infallible” and “inerrant” to describe the Bible. The Bible is to be read literally because “it says what it means and means what it says.” The historical context and culture that gave birth to a particular text are unimportant as the truth of what the text says is just as applicable today as it was in the day it was first spoken. Reading the Bible this way, every verse carries the same authority as any other—at least in theory. These Christians commonly pick and choose which verses they emphasize, depending on the issue being discussed. They commonly proclaim “The Bible says” to validate their positions and beliefs.

This way of reading and using the Bible leads to clearly defined right-and-wrong positions on every issue. It fosters black-and-white thinking with either-or positions on the issue. This black-and-white, either-or thinking tends to be fixed and rigid as “biblical truth—that is, “God’s truth” —is nonnegotiable. “Right belief” is central in this version of Christianity.

Those who view and use the Bible this way proudly call themselves conservatives and evangelicals. Originally, this group called themselves fundamentalists. This identity was tied to their embrace of seven core truths that they referred to as the fundamentals of the faith. The first of those seven fundamentals was this view of the Bible as the inspired, inerrant, infallible Word of God. In the last half of the last century, these fundamentalists chose the name “evangelical” to replace the term “fundamentalist.”

Those who view and use the Bible this way refer to the other category of Christians as liberals. Members of this other group generally refer to themselves as progressives.

These so-called liberals or progressives hold differing views of the Bible. Many of them also hold the Bible in high regard but do not view it as infallible or inerrant. They acknowledge that it is divinely inspired while recognizing a human element in it. They identify within the Bible multiple understandings of God and how God interacts with the world—what today we call theologies. These multiple understandings reflect the cultural setting from which they came. Some of those understandings are at odds with other theologies in the Bible. Some actually challenge and contradict an earlier understanding. In the progressive’s way of thinking, all texts do not hold the same authority.

Progressives speak of Jesus—not the Bible—as the Word of God (John 1:1-18). Most view Jesus as the in-the-flesh expression of God who reveals to us what God is like while teaching us the ways of God (the kingdom). As such, Jesus is the final authority to which they turn. The Bible is read through the lens of Jesus. What does not align with the life, ministry, and teachings of Jesus is viewed as culturally conditioned and therefore nonbinding in today’s culture.

This approach to scripture emphasizes the teachings of Jesus as opposed to beliefs about Jesus. Following Jesus’s teachings about God, it understands the nature of God to be self-giving, servant love. Such love is expressed in grace and forgiveness. It embraces all—without exception, without condition—as beloved children of God. It is expressed in a servant spirit that seeks the good and wholeness of each beloved child of God. This focus makes justice issues a greater priority than moral issues. It seeks to establish a loving and just society for all—i.e., the kingdom of God. Thus, “right living” or right relationships (orthopraxy) takes priority over “right belief” (orthodoxy).

This way of viewing and using the Bible calls for disciplined thinking that is informed by biblical scholarship. It is less rigid as it continually seeks additional insight and understanding.

In my mind, the heart of the matter is the God revealed in scripture, not the scripture itself. Scripture is a tool given to us that we might know God and the ways of God. The God revealed to us in Jesus the-word-made-flesh—as recorded in scripture—is what is most important.