Loving as Jesus Loved

The Spirit’s role is to make salvation — the transformation of our hearts and minds — into a reality in our lives. The Spirit teaches us to think with the mind of Christ (1 Corinthians 2:16b). The Spirit works to mature us into the likeness of Christ. The end result of the Spirit’s work in our lives is to empower us to love as Jesus loved, to love those whom Jesus loved.

In his letter to the Galatians, the Apostle Paul identified love — God’s kind of self-giving, agape love — as the first of nine traits he called the fruit of the Spirit. The ability to love as Jesus loved comes through the Spirit’s work in our lives.

In order to free us to love as Jesus loved, the Spirit works to transform the spirit or inner disposition out of which we live. Inherent to our human condition is an inner disposition driven by anxiety and fear — fear of being hurt, fear of being left out, rejected, and abandoned, fear of being inadequate and not measuring up (i.e., being powerless), fear of being insignificant and unimportant (not valued or respected or loved). These fears naturally morph into an angry, negative spirit. The Spirit works to transform this inner disposition or spirit out of which we live. “The fruit of the Spirit is … joy and peace” (Galatians 5:22). The Spirit works to displace our anxiety and fear with peace, our negativity and anger with joy.

The spirit or inner disposition out of which we live governs how we view and treat others. Consequently, what is in our hearts — the interior realm — is reflected in our relationships.

When we live out of an anxious, negative spirit, we are irritated with those who do not measure up to our expectations. We are critical and judgmental of them. Embedded in our criticism of them is an unconscious attitude of being better than them — arrogance. Looking down on them, we distance ourselves from them emotionally and physically. We are hard and harsh in how we think of them, speak of them, and treat them.  But the joy and peace the Spirit cultivates in our hearts allows us to be patient rather than irritated, kind rather than critical and judgmental, generous in how we respond rather than feeling better than them, faithful rather than distancing ourselves, gentle rather than hard and harsh in how we think about, speak about, and treat them. “The fruit of the Spirit is … patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness” (Galatians 5:22-23). These five relational traits are what love looks like in our relationships.

We cannot love when we are anxious and afraid or when we are negative and angry. Joy and peace free us to love as Jesus loved.

Thus, the key to loving as Jesus loved is being aware of and managing the inner disposition of our hearts — what Paul called self-control. “The fruit of the Spirit is … self-control” (Galatians 5:23). The Spirit makes us aware of the anxiety and fear, the anger and negativity deep inside (self-awareness). This awareness is a call to put ourselves in a position for the Spirit to work. It is a call to pray so the Spirit can transform what is in our hearts. The Spirit leads us beyond our anxiety and fear into peace, beyond our anger and negativity into joy. That Spirit-produced joy and peace free us to choose a different what of responding to the other. We choose to be patient, kind, generous, faithful, and gentle. Joy and peace free us to love as Jesus loved … through the transforming, empowering work of the Spirit.

The Spirit works to transform our hearts and minds, empowering us to love as Jesus loved.

(This understanding of the fruit of the Spirit is developed in my book The Fruit of the Spirit: the Path That Leads to Loving as Jesus Loved. The book is available through my webpage: pastorstevelangford.com.)